I’ve touched upon having Anxiety in my previous posts. However, having Anxiety during a Global Pandemic can be even more so crippling. For me, I have a difficult time with abrupt changes. I typically need some notice to mentally prepare myself for dealing with the stress of any large transition. I also thrive with instant gratification. Waiting for the result of anything can sometimes make me feel physically ill because of the mental impact of not knowing the end result. Thankfully with medication and proper breathing, I mostly have my Anxiety under control… but I never planned for a pandemic.
Both of my sons’ birthdays are at the end of March. My older son is turning 6 and my baby is turning 1. I was planning to do two separate birthday parties; complete with Pinterest worthy themes and decorations for each of them. I sent out both of their invitations in early February. I am a planner. I like to plan everything. Sometimes it’s just in my head, and sometimes it’s on a tangible piece of paper. Either way, I like to have a plan; and a backup. This pandemic didn’t leave me with a true backup; and that frightens me.
I’ve been following the news, articles, posts, CDC, etc. All of which have NO definitive answer. There is NO true end in sight. There is NO answer for when this will end for us here in the United States. The unknown is what is scary. It’s frustrating because I look too far in advance in hopes that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. The Novel Coronavirus (even with seeing the original struggles to keep this contained in China) didn’t really effect me because China is geographically so far away. I sympathized with the Chinese people, but I couldn’t truly empathize. Unfortunately, now I can empathize.
The shutdown of businesses, restaurants, and schools means that this is serious. The more that we work together to socially isolate, the better chance we have at containing this fast spreading pain-in-the-ass virus! It’s inconvenient and it’s terrifying for more than just the fear of myself or a loved one getting sick or dying. People are literally losing their livelihoods. This is why it’s so important for early compliance in regards to socially isolating. The more people who comply, the better chances we have at getting through this ghost town isolation sooner rather than later. We have a better chance at saving lives. Lives are not replaceable. Please try your very best to stay home. Do NOT have play dates. Do NOT have parties. Think about the ramifications that come with allowing this virus to spread. Was it worth that play date?
I often carry the weight of the World on my shoulders. I’m constantly thinking of ways I can make the World a better place. It’s just who I am. My brain is constantly going. I wish I had more money, time, and more me to go around. It’s the burden of an empathetic anxious person. I’m okay with that. I’ve come to terms with being this person. Now, I’m learning that I can not control the actions of others, only how I react to their actions.
Things I can control/ Things I can do to help:
- Spending quality and valuable time with my sons and husband during this time: Making memories by playing board games, watching movies, and making crafts. Extra cuddles and hugs are definitely needed right now too.
- Letting my husband help me: Sometimes I need my husband to bring me back down to Earth. I need a hug. I need him to take over with the kids, laundry, dishes, etc. He is more than happy to do whatever needs to be done; as he is my teammate. I just need to let him.
- Making purposeful decisions with my time: I NEED to stop scrolling on Facebook, Instagram, and Social Media every 5 minutes! It will not make anything happen any faster. I NEED to focus on my family. I try to always FaceTime with my parents everyday. It helps me, but it also helps my kids and my parents too. I NEED to let more things slide (this one is easier said than done).
- Taking everything one day at a time: I can’t look more than one day ahead at a time. Focusing too far into the future in times like these can only cause more panic and stress. One day at a time… again, easier said than done, but it’s the truth.
We all need to open up our hearts a little more during this time. We need to come together with one mindset. We need each other’s hearts more than ever. The greed and hatred will only continue to divide us. Let this pandemic bring something positive to our World. We’ve been watching a lot of Frozen 2 lately. Ironically, the whole movie is a huge metaphor for change and dealing with things you can’t control. Olaf says to Anna “Hey Anna, just thought of one thing permanent, Love.” Love is our constant. I’m hoping it can help us all through this scary and uncertain time. If you have Anxiety, or know someone who is. You aren’t alone. We’re in this together.